Japanese Lesson 4 - Individual & Community
The Japanese culture has an underlying pressure to conform. One physician tells me: in Japan, homogeneity extends beyond ethnicity to appearances, clothing, and accessories. If you differ, people take notice and it's not culturally acceptable to stand out. That may explain why fads start and spread so quickly there, such as why so many currently bleach/dye their hair blond or brown. (But someone has to start the trends.) My coworkers seem surprised by the "individuality" expressed in the U.S. as people dress and do "whatever they want."

There is, however a current of disconnect and isolation in many families in Asia. My Japanese boss tells me that once kids are ~10 years old, they are "on their own," even in making life decisions. (Certainly they still get money, food, shelter, and the pervasive expectation to succeed.) For children, education trumps all priorities. Adults are tied to their work. Classic cases are the men of Japan who's legendary workoholic natures isolate them from their wives and children. And this is normal. Some coworkers tell me they are so use to working, they wouldn't know what to do with free time. This is not to say the families have less love, only they spend less time together and risk becoming strangers who happen living together. For examples on the disconnect of modern Asian family, I recommend the Japanese movie Shall We Dance, or a better example, the Taiwanese movie Yi Yi. Contrast that with the fascinating movie To Live.